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5 things (not) to do at a wedding

Things not to do when you attend a wedding:

1. Only give yourself 2 hours to complete a 1 hour trip. Apparently that is a ludicrously small buffer when you're dealing with traffic getting out of London. Ten minutes into our trip, we were in gridlock, and I was sweating balls.


2. Agree to meet your in laws (read: babysitters) at the venue with only an hour to spare before the wedding starts. They too will be stuck in traffic, so that while you're already running late you now need to get ready while juggling both kids that you should have palmed off by now.


3. Take both kids in their very non wedding attire to the ceremony with you because the babysitters have still not arrived. Or at the very least ensure you are armed with a butt load of lollies and a dummy to keep them quiet...neither of which we had. If I thought I was sweating stuck in traffic, that was nothing compared to the nervous waterfall I had going on at this stage.


4. Wish the bride would show up on time. Those precious extra ten minutes allowed the babysitters to show up, run through the waiting guests to scoop the kids up and carry them off to a place where Wolfie could cease complaining about having to sit still, and Wilder could be free to drool on someone not wearing cocktail dress.


5. Go check on the kids between ceremony and reception. They will suddenly remember that you essentially threw them away in a hurry without a proper goodbye and start the guilt inducing waterworks. Your babysitters will not be impressed.


Things you should absolutely do when you attend a wedding:

1. Be thankful your kids aren't with you


2. Drink a shedload of champagne


3. Catch up with your old friends


4. Dance until your feet hurt


5. Fall into bed with your sleeping toddler and be very grateful for traveling babysitters


Congratulations Mr & Mrs MC!

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